Friday, June 02, 2006

Lord of the Cul-De-Sac

Listen ye blog readers, for I shall tell ye a tale. A tale of a mysterious neighborhood living somewhere deep in the misty woods of Tualatin/Portland. Yes, true adventure awaits for those emboldened for the journey. Beware, though! This neighborhood tis not for the faint of heart! Without making thee bite thine nails or tap thein foot any further, BEHOLD: The Lord of The Rings Suburban Neighborhood.

Yes, it is Rivendell Drive. The gateway to a marvelous suburban subdivision that is for some unknown reason entirely named (and somewhat themed) after The Lord of the Rings. I wasn't sure what I'd find, but as it turns out I found a lot!

Exhibit A: A VERY EVIL MAIL BOX. I have no idea what's even going on here, but that mailbox just flat out looks dangerous. I would expect this sort of thing from a home on Mordor drive, not Rivendell.

Let's see what other charming streets we can find while strolling down Rivendell Drive, shall we?

Yes, those no-good TOOKS are here. Property values just went DOWN.

Yep, they're all here.

There's even a fire-pit nestled into the Thistlebrook Court Cul-De-Sac, so the hobbitses can roast their whatevers and sing their eye-rollingly long and boring songs while the sun goes down.

I'm still really curious exactly as to HOW this happened. One of the residents bird-dogged me while I was taking photos of the signs. When I asked him what the deal was, he pretty much shrugged and said something along the lines of 'they're all named after a children's book or something... I don't know...' I want to go back with a video camera and interview everyone to figure out What the Deal Is. The going theory is that some hippie had the land in their family and agreed to sell it UNDER CONDITIONS ONE..... At least I hope that's the story, that's the best story.

Though, right in the center of Rivendell Drive, there is one house that's far and away bigger and architecturally different than the rest:

I'd say there's a fair chance that whomever built this house is ELROND, THE LORD OF RIVENDELL.


So thus concludes your tour of this magical land. If you'd like to see this place for yourself, I'd be happy to draw you a map, it's right up the street from my office.


Anonymous said...

You may want to inquire of the trees - Emt could surely give you the answers you seek - including the tale of how many were slaughtered to clear the land and build the houses...

Anonymous said...

nutty oregonian!

Anonymous said...

That. is. amazing.

The best part is someone actually did not understand the reference. There must be so many nerds out there that would kill to live in that neighborhood.

Anonymous said...

This is stupid

Anonymous said...

Ha lol who put this up .Nice